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Help Teenagers Conquer Stress and Anxiety Stress has become a way of life for most American teenagers. They’re bombarded from every angle with pressures and expectations, leaving too little time for unwinding and resting. When Group Magazine asked 20,000 Christian teenagers about their top needs, the third most common response was “I need help managing or dealing with the stresses in my life.” Pennsylvania youth minister Jana Snyder said of today’s kids, “I sense an overwhelming burden to be successful and to be busy doing 100 different things every day.” In a recent Associated Press/MTV survey, 13- to 17-year-olds said school is their main worry. Stress, not relationships, is the hottest topic of conversation at school, says one teenager. Another adds, “I’m just really overwhelmed. I even compete with my parents about who’s stressing more.” Child psychiatrist Thomas McCormack suggests several ways that parents can help ease teenagers’ academic stress. First, discuss your expectations. Assure kids that you’re proud of them when they try their best, no matter the outcome. Second, stay involved. Show interest in your teenagers’ classes, extracurricular activities, church and schedules. Be available to help or talk when needed. Finally, watch for sudden declines in academic performance. These could indicate a learning disorder or emotional distress (such as depression and anxiety) that requires professional evaluation. Read on to discover more insights about helping teenagers manage life’s stress.   PulsePulsePulsePulsePulsePulsePulse Here’s a snapshot of teenagers’ experiences with stress: Teenage girls are 55% more likely than teenage boys to say they pressure themselves to get good grades in school. And less than half of the pressured group of girls believes their parents realize how stressed-out they are.                     (ronicohensandler.com) Although one major study found that kids from middle-income households experience more stress than their peers, another found that affluent kids are the most stressed, for fear of “falling back.” (AP/MTV; New York Times/CBS) An estimated 10% of teenagers suffer from an anxiety disorder.                          (teenhelp.com) Highly stressed teenagers are twice as likely as other teenagers to smoke, drink, get drunk, and use illegal drugs. (alcoholism.about.com)   Great Questions ...to Ask Your Kids  Tackle the topic of stress by asking your kids these discussion starters: 1. How stressed have you been lately? What things cause you the most anxiety, and why? Describe what your body and mind feel like when you’re stressed out. 2. What are some ways you cope with stress? Which of these are productive, and which are destructive? 3. What amount of stress, if any, is necessary or helpful in life? Would you want to be stress-free? Why or why not? 4. Is it sinful to be stressed out? Why or why not? How we can give our anxieties over to God?   GOD AND YOUR FAMILY Pray that: 1. God will help your teenagers cast all their anxieties and burdens on him because he cares for them (1 Peter 5:7). 2. Your teenagers will put their lives and worries into God’s hands, knowing that he has a perfect plan and purpose for them. 3. Your teenagers will find healthy ways to deal with academic, social, and emotional stress. 4. Your family and home can be a haven for teenagers when they feel overwhelmed by school and life.   VERSE OF THE MONTH “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (Matthew 11:28-29) Jesus offers respite from the many anxieties and cares of daily life. Because he was fully human, he knows what it’s like to face challenges and expectations. By praying to Jesus and trusting him to help us, we can find peace for our worried hearts and minds.   INSIGHTS from SimplyYouthMinistry.com lives, he decided to return to high school. Read his whole account at SimplyYouthMinistry.com. Walking the halls of Warsaw High School as a 33-year-old sophomore for two weeks was pretty overwhelming at points. I faced fears and insecurities that I haven’t felt since I was in high school myself (back when Michael Jackson and mullets were cool). However, I gained a newfound respect for kids and the pressures they face. Here are a few observations I made: Kids don’t own their time. It doesn’t belong to them. If I want to eat lunch at 11:30 instead of at noon, I eat early. I forgot what it was like to not make personal decisions about my time. Every day, kids spend a large portion of their hours trying to excel in areas that they aren’t exceptionally good at and possibly don’t enjoy. I know this is a necessary part of education, but I never thought about how frustrating that must be. Kids are getting pressure from everyone. One student told me he has 13 bosses: five teachers, one principal, two coaches, two employers, two parents, and a youth pastor. He said every one of these people has expectations for him, and none of those expectations are low. Kids may not have a mortgage or hungry mouths to feed, but their pressures are very real to them. We must keep that in mind, especially if they let us down or don’t live up to the standards we set. Kids all want to excel, even if it means excelling at being bad. We adults run so fast and hard ourselves that we have to ration the attention we give teenagers. They’re longing for our love, attention, and focused time. They’re longing to be known—and known well. We must carve out serious time and emotional energy for kids and create environments and schedules that encourage biblical community.   FilmWatch Movie: Easy A (releases Sept. 17)                 Genre: Comedy Rating: PG-13 (for mature thematic elements, including sexuality, language and drugs) Synopsis: Olive (Emma Stone) is a clean-cut high schooler whose image changes when a rumor begins that she’s lost her virginity. When Olive’s life starts to parallel that of Hester Prynne’s in The Scarlet Letter, she takes advantage of the school’s rumor mill to advance her social and financial standing. Discussion Questions: Why do rumors spread so quickly? Once a rumor gets going, is there any way to stop it? Explain. What does it feel like to have a rumor spread about you? What are the short- and long-term consequences of rumors, even if they’re true? Read aloud Proverbs 18:7-8. Why does God oppose rumors? What are some positive alternatives to participating in the spread of rumors?   Friday the 13th Lock-in — No Worries Just a few days before school started for many youth, we held a Back to School Lock-in. As parents, we don’t always hear the message associated with all the “fun”. So, I thought I would give you a sample of part of the lesson. As many of you may know  Triskaidekaphobia is the fear of Friday the 13th. By some accounts it was likely created during the middle ages, when on a Friday the 13th in 1306, King Philip of France arrested, tortured and then murdered the revered Knights Templar. Before that, there are Biblical references to the unlucky number 13. Judas, the apostle who betrayed Jesus, was the 13th guest to the Last Supper. It is traditionally believed that Eve tempted Adam with the apple on a Friday. Tradition also has it that the Flood in the Bible, the confusion at the Tower of Babel, and the death of Jesus Christ all took place on Friday. Trusting in God helps us free ourselves from the things that cause anxiety—the fears of embarrassment, of being unpopular, not being attractive, bad grades, and a myriad of other things. Only around 10 percent of modern day Americans believe that Friday the 13th is an unlucky day, yet it is still a well recognized superstition, causing people to joke about it and be perhaps a little more cautious than usual. Friday the thirteenth falls between one and three times a year, providing us with a good excuse for having some fun with it and perhaps, even for facing our fears about it. I asked for a volunteer to come forward and strapped a 50lb backpack to her back. She showed obvious discomfort and I asked her to set the back pack on the ground. As she dipped to the ground, I said something like, “God doesn’t want Christians to carry around extra weight. When you dip toward the ground as you set down your worries, why not go all the way to your knees and ask God to help you with your burden?” We broke into small groups of six and continued our discussion in four different sessions throughout the night. Here’s a sample of the discussion questions. If you had absolute control over your troubles, would you still worry? Why or why not? Would you worry if you knew that God has complete control over all problems? Why does God let us make bad choices?  Check out Psalm 112:7-8. He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. His heart is secure, he will have no fear; in the end he will look in triumph on his foes. It really seemed like a great way to get the youth started back to school and send or 2010 seniors out to begin an new segment of their Christian journeys. Check out more lessons at - http://admin.westheightsumc.org/ylessons.htm